Weird Science: Fanfiction

TV 14

Season 6, Episode 11:
"A Farber Halloween"

"You make man…"
"No, Woman."
"Woman?"

Gary and Wyatt look at each other as the Weird Science song starts, showing the following scenes (note- 'S6!' means a new scene from season 6):

-The keyboard 'Enter' button is pressed
-Weird Science logo
-Lightning strikes the house
-Lisa created
-View of Lisa, moving up
-Gary and Wyatt travel through the dream gate
-Bazooka boys forming
-Catwoman Lisa
-Gary's poet within is zapped out right next to him
-With Lisa, Gary, and Wyatt in the background, Chett does the disco dance of innocence and his arm flies off
-Lisa blows magic kiss to Wyatt

Michael Manasseri clips
-Old West Wyatt gets pulled through the time warp
-(S6!) Falls down into an island lagoon
-Turns into nightmare id monster
-Head gets pulled off
-(S6!) In pajamas, with wet hair, gets zapped by Lisa into day clothes and dry hair

John Mallory Asher clips
-(S6!) Swings a frustrated fist in a black and white scene
-(S6!) About to bite an apple as it gets zapped into a remote control
-Lisa's finger touches his head, zapping him a super large brain
-Beams down inside Farber High with Tetrahydrozaline

Lee Tergeson clips
-Playing the piano on Groundhog Day
-Buccaneer hat placed on his head zaps him into the Pirate King
-Fighting Principal Scampi as the room flashes with yellow electricity
-(S6!) As suited Principal, gets face slapped
-Jumps down from ceiling as secret agent wearing black outfit

Vanessa Angel clips
-(S6!) Wearing a Scooby Doo T-shirt on a tropical island, zaps up a compass in her hand
-Carefully enters a dark cave, carrying a 'light saber' glowing stick
-Tiger on grave morphs into Lisa wearing a tiger-print dress
-Wearing glasses and suit disguised as a school teacher
-Large grinning close-up

- Gary and Wyatt in tuxedoes rocket up wearing jetpacks - Lisa, Gary, Wyatt, and Chett are all wearing earphones, singing around a microphone - (S6!) Lisa with her arms around Gary and Wyatt, zaps them and all 3 disappear - Black & white Dr. Frankenstein "She's alive! Alive!"

 

Scene opens to Chett sitting in his office at Farber High School as Principal. He is on the phone talking to some vendors about something special coming up.

A FARBER HALLOWEEN

Chett: Yeah, that's 100 lbs. of candy corn; 200 cases of Soda pop; window and hallway decorations; and a whole lot of munchies.

Special Appearance by:
Sarah Michelle Gellar

Vendor: Are you kidding me?  What could anyone possibly want with all that candy corn and soda pop?

Chett: Look, can you deliver or can't you?  I really need all this stuff for something I'm planning.

Written by:
WeirdScience.Net!

Vendor: Oh sure, if you're actually serious...

Chett: Well, of course I'm serious! Why else would I be asking for this stuff?

Vendor: Okay then. We'll be by tomarrow with your order.

Chett: Great! Just bring a bill when you drop off the goods.

Chett hangs up and calls for Wyatt to report to his office.

Chett: Attention Farber Students: "Would Wyatt Donnelly please report to my office immediately."

Wyatt gets up from his seat in his current class and head to Chett's office. He enters and has a seat in front of Chett's desk.

Chett: Wyatt! How's my favorite buddy in the whole world?

Wyatt: What's up Chett?

Chett: I wanted you here to ask if Lisa could help me with something I'm planning for Halloween?

Wyatt: You're not planning a Halloween party here at school are you? 'Cause that would not be such a good idea. If anyone from the school board should find out you'd be in some serious trouble.

Chett: A Halloween Party? No. Of course not! .....

Wyatt: Then why do you need Lisa?

Chett: Okay, okay! You caught me. Now promise you won't spill this info. out to anyone else.

Wyatt: Yeah, yeah, sure!

Chett: Good. Now here's my plan. Remember last Halloween when you were having your party at home and I came in trying to scare all your guests? Well, I figure that since I'm now the Principal of Farber, why not have a really scarry Halloween party right here at Farber? We'll have Lisa zap the place into the scarriest Halloween ghost house you've ever seen! Are you with me?

Wyatt: Well, I really don't think this is such a good idea..

Chett: Why not? We have Lisa, don't we? She's a magic genie so if anything happens she can always fix it.

Wyatt: Well, yeah....

Chett: (interupting) Good. Now, we have to keep everything a secret a couple days so no one on the school board finds out.

Screen fades out and fades in to the Donnelly house (outside shot, then moving inside) with Chett and  Wyatt in the Living room.

Chett: Where's Lisa?

Wyatt: She's still in the computer.

Chett: Well, let's get her. I have something to ask her.

All of a sudden Lisa zaps in.

Lisa: Thought I heard my name mentioned?

Chett: Yes. I need to ask a favor from you?

Lisa: You want a favor from me? You've gotta be joking! Why would I do a favor for you after everything you've done to Wyatt over the years?

Wyatt: Oh, it's okay Lis.  Besides, Chett's not the same person anymore - he's changed quite a bit since he became Principal.

Lisa: Well, let's hear him out then...

Chett: Okay, what I've been thinking is having a BIG Halloween Party at Farber, but I'll need some help from you to get the school all decorated and setup right. All the supplies are coming in -- Candy corn, Soda pop, etc.

Lisa: A Halloween Party? But, I hate Halloween -- it's the worst day of the year.

Wyatt: NO its not! Halloween is the best. All the candy you get to eat, custumes, scarry movies...

Chett: (interupting) the parties.... so you in, Lis?

Lisa: Well, okay. What exactly did you want me to do?

Chett: Oh, nothing much.... just zap the school into a Haunted Mansion with lots of ghosts, goblins, vampires, scarry music, you know all the Halloween type stuff.

Wyatt: Can you do it, Lis?

Lisa: Of course!  Here, I'll just wave my hand once and presto the school will be transformed into the scarriest haunted mansion ever!!

Lisa raises her left hand which is now glowing with blue electricity and waives it from one side to the other.

Lisa: Done.

Chett: That's it?

Lisa: Yup. When you go back to school tomarrow, you'll be scarred out of the living daylights! (Zaps out.)

Cut to Farber High showing blue electricity covering the whole place when all of a sudden it explodes in a big blue flash and then reveals a frightning looking ghost house in it's place. You see ghosts flying in and out of the windows (second floor), hear scarry (Halloween) music playing, as the screen fades out slowly for the episode's first commercial break.

 

Screen fades back in showing Chett getting ready to go to school to get the rest of the Halloween preps ready for the party that night.

Chett: Yo, Pitt-lick! Get up! Time to go get the school ready for tonight.

Wyatt: Lisa allready took care of everything though.

Chett: She did most of it, but there's still lots we have to. Now let's go!!

Chett and Wyatt drive off for Farber and arrive infront of something that litterly scares them halve to death! As they drive into the parking lot, they can even hear the chilling ghostly calls and wailing coming from inside along with the scarry music.

Wyatt: Whoa!! Um, I don't think I wanna go in there, Chett. I'll wait right here, k?

Chett: What are you, a wussy? You're not staying here, you're coming in with me. Think I wanna go into something Lisa zapped up all by myself. I don't think so. There's no telling what may be in there. You know Lisa's magic better than anyone so you're coming too.

Wyatt: Well, how bad can it be anyway? Lisa wouldn't zap up something too scarry now or something that would kill us, would she?

Chett: No, of course not! Man, is this gonna be one Halloween to remember!

Wyatt: Or one really bad nightmare...

Chett and Wyatt enter the school (or rather Haunted Mansion) to have a look around. The whole place is completely dark, with haunted music playing, the sounds of ghosts whailing, the bone-crackling sound of skeletons, etc. all throughout the school. As they enter the main hallway, Chett stumbles upon something as they continue walking around...

Chett: Holy smokes! What's this? A Halloween ride...?

Wyatt: Gotta love her! (speaking about Lisa)

Chett stumbled upon a Ghost train ride which appears to go all the way around the school. Chett and Wyatt hop in and are about to have the ride of a life-time!

As the train gets moving, it speeds up faster and faster going through all the Haunted areas - some of which are truly scarry causing Wyatt to scream during the whole ride. Chett is even a little scarred, too!

Wyatt: This is the last time I let Lisa zap with one hand!

Chett: Oh c'mon Wyatt, it ain't that bad.

Wyatt: Not that bad, oh you've gotta be joking!

Just then they hear a familiar voice chanting.. "Chester... Chester.... Chester..." coming in the direction of Chett's office. They start walking towards Chett's office to find out who or what they are hearing. When they get there, they find Scampi standing there waiting for Chett to arrive.

Scampi: Chester, Chester, Chester. What have you done now?

Chett: Cool it, Scamps! We're just having a little fun. It's Halloween you know.

Scampi: Well, just imagine what the school board will have to say about this if they find out. I don't think I'll be able to cover for you this time, Chester.

Chett: They arn't gonna find out. We've got Lisa, remember? (turns to Wyatt) By the way, Where is she, anyway?

Wyatt: Back home in my computer probably. She doesn't care for Halloween...

Scampi: Well, you guys sure have done a nice job turning the school into a Haunted Mansion. It sure is is spooky in here!

Chett: You really think so?

Scampi: Oh definitely!

Screen fades out to black.

 

Fades back in to show the Farber High School sign in front and the Haunted Mansion with all the guests (the students,)actually start coming in. The time is 8pm Halloween night. Cameras move around showing off the Haunted Mansion, and just how frightening the place really is. Footage of the customes the guests are wearing, — Clowns, Skeletons, Vampires, Witches, Wearwolves. Guests are screaming as they enter the place and roam around.

Chett: (looking on from his office with Wyatt) Yes! This party is gonna be a huge success! Where's Lisa?

Wyatt: I told you, she doesn't like Halloween.

Chett: So what does that mean? She's not gonna miss the party?

Wyatt: I'm afraid so, Chett.

Chett: Well, what if something goes wrong and we need her?

Wyatt: We're gonna have to deal with it ourselves. She's not gonna come and help out inside this Hanuted place.

Chett and Wyatt start roaming around mingling with the guests and having a good time in the Haunted Mansion. (Chett and Wyatt are both dressed up in custumes as well -- Wyatt as a mime again, and Chett as a 'Millionair'.)

Dick: (to Chett) Great Haunted House, Mr. Donnelly!

Chett: Thanks! Glad you like it.

Paula: Yeah, this is one excellent party and a great Haunted House! Have you seen Gary around, yet?

Chett: No. Don't know where he is?

Paula: Oh, that's okay, I'll look around. I'm sure he's here somewhere.

Wyatt comes over to Chett in the main hallway.

Wyatt: Hey - Chett, this is one great party, but what if some of these Vampires turn out to be real? You know, Lisa's magic is not completely reliable....

Chett: Oh, you worry too much! There's no such thing as Vampires! Just go enjoy the party, sis!

Wyatt walks away into the crowd, trying to enjoy himself and the party, while Chett remains watching over his party in the main hallway, as he recieves some visits from some guests.

Vampire: (taps Chett on the back) Is this your party?

Chett: Yes. You like?

Vampire: Yes. It will surely help in my quest for human blood.

Chett: Huh?

Chett: (turns and walks away and thinks to himself) A Vampire on a quest for human blood. Uh! Nah, it couldn't be.... or could it? Could Lisa's magic have zapped in real ones, too?

Chett goes to find Wyatt, but runs into a couple more Vampires before getting to Wyatt. Up until then, he wasn't convinced they were real, but when he started getting blocked in all directions by them and when one actually changed into a bat and flew right by his neck, his mind was convinced -- Lisa's magic MUST have zapped in some real Vampires, also. After that bat flys by, Chett manages to quickly run past the other vampires starting to close-in, and continues looking for Wyatt. He finds Wyatt back in his office.

Chett: (to Wyatt) Quick, go get Lisa. We need her big time! You were right - she did zap up some real ones, too!

Wyatt: What? Where?

Chett: Vampires! Over there!

Wyatt has a look around and sees some Vampires standing around along with a few bats inside the place. He also sees one the bat change back into their human form....

Wyatt: UHH!!! Oh this just great! (turns back to Chett) See! I told ya this wasn't a good idea!  Now, we're all gonna get it!

Chett: Oh, cool it sis! Just go get Lisa -- real FAST!!

Wyatt leaves to head home for Lisa. He gets home and heads up to his room to call her up from his computer as the screen fades out for the episode's second commercial break.

 

Screen fades back in to Wyatt's bedroom showing Wyatt calling Lisa up from the computer.

Lisa: (Zaps in) What's up, Wyatt?

Wyatt: We need you at school right away! Turns out that you also brought some real Vampires when you zapped the place into a Haunted Mansion.

Lisa: Me go inside that place? Not likely! I'm not going anywhere near that Haunted Mansion. Uh-Uh!

Wyatt: Lis, you've gotta! If you don't innocent people are gonna die.

Lisa: Well, even if I did, I can't undo my magic, remember?

Wyatt: Oh yeah. Well, in that case what we need is someone trained to kill and take down Vampires.

Lisa: I know! Go back to school and when you get there you'll see someone who can help.

Wyatt leaves and heads back to the Haunted Mansion. As he approaches the school, he thinks he recognizes someone he knows fom TV.

Wyatt: Buffy? Is that you?

Buffy: Yes. Who are you?

Wyatt: My name's Wyatt.

Buffy: Well, what's going on here? One minute I was on the set filming an episode when all of a sudden I was transported here.

Wyatt: Well, its a long story. I'll tell you about it after we get rid of all the Vampires inside.

Buffy: Vampires!

Wyatt: Yes.   (talking fast) You see, I have this magic genie named Lisa, but when my older brother, Chett, had to ask Lisa to zap the whole school into a Haunted House for Halloween she also zapped in some real Vampires too. (end fast talk)

Buffy: Why would your so called 'Magic Genie' do that?

Wyatt: Well, her magic is very unreliable and everytime she zaps something, something always goes wrong.

Buffy: Oh, that must suck! So let me get this straight - I was zapped here to get rid of these Vampires, right?

Wyatt: Exactly. Think you can handle it?

Buffy:   No sweat!

Buffy enters the building with her wooden crosses and sticks. Calling out for the Vampires as she walks around. She runs into Chett while looking for them.

Chett: Sweet sizzling cheescakes! Who the heck are you?

Buffy: I'm a Vampire hunter. The name's Buffy.

Chett: Buffy, from the tv show "Buffy: The Vampire Slayer"? That's my favorite show - I never miss an episode!

Buffy: The same, and quit sucking up -- I hate guys that do that.

Chett: Sucking up? Me? I'm not trying to suck up. Say, How about you and me get together somewhere calm after this whole mess is settled?

Buffy: No thank you. I don't date guys who just give me more work.

One of the vampires walks by just then.

Buffy: Hey you! Hold it right there!

Vampire: What? You're telling me to stay? Just what do you think you're gonna do?

Buffy: This! (shoots one of her wooden crosses directly into the Vampires chest.)

Vampire: Wha...What! You're that Buffy person who goes around killing us, aren't you? (falls down, dead)

Buffy: Yup!

Chett: Wow! Nice work, there! But, um, how did you know that he was a real one and not just someone dressed up as one?

Buffy: Instinct, I guess. Been doing this for so long that I've begun sensing when real Vampires are around.

Chett: Oh. Think you can teach me that sense?

Buffy: No, unfortunately you have to be born with the sense and very few people are. I do what I do because I am one of the very few who have it. Now, if you don't mind I've gotta search this place for more. You wait here. (continues walking around searching the place.)

Chett goes back to his office to make an announcement to the whole school. He runs into Scampi as well.

Scampi: Oh Chester! Now you've made a mess of everything.

Chett: Huh? There's no mess! Everything's all taken care off -- We have Buffy here now...

Scampi: Well, this never should have happened. When will you learn to just make responsible decisions?

Chett: Why should I, when I have you? (picks up the microphone) "Attention: All Farber Students. We have a state of emergency here. Don't panic, but please leave the building in an orderly fassion as quickly as you can."

Scampi: Well, well, well, looks like I may have said that too soon. Looks like you can make good decisions and can take action in your own hands. I'm so proud of you son.

Chett: (continues on the P.A. System) "p.s. turns out we have some real Vampires among us, so watch your backs! Over and out!"

Scampi: CHESTER! Now you did it again! You're going to start a mad rush for the exits and what a mad house this is going to become.

Chett: Well, they do have a right to know what's going on....

Cut to show everyone running to the exits. Scene changes to outside shot showing the front of the school with everyone exiting quickly. Wyatt is still waiting on the outside when Lisa zaps in.

Wyatt: LISA! I thought you said you hated Haunted Mansions.

Lisa: I do! Maybe now you know why...

Wyatt: What? You don't mean you had something to do with these vampires, did you?

Lisa: No of course not!

Wyatt: LISA!!

Lisa: Well, okay, I might have. I may have zapped in a few real ones to teach you and Chett a lesson.

Wyatt: So you jeopardized everyone's safety just to teach us a lesson? And what lesson would that be anyway?

Lisa: Oh, just to show you why Haunted Mansions and Halloween are so bad, and also how bad Chett's idea was....

Wyatt: Well, at least everyone's getting out safely.

Lisa: Of course they are. The Vampires are only after you and Chett. I told you they were only meant to teach you guys a lesson -- not to hurt anyone else.

Wyatt: Oh no. Chett's still inside. We've gotta go get him!

Lisa: What do you mean, 'We?' I'm not going in there -- uh-uh no way!!

Wyatt: Fine. Then, I'll go in.

Lisa: No, don't. It's too dangerous. Chett's an ex-marine, he'll be fine. Trust me.

Wyatt: Well, maybe you're right. Besides, he's got Buffy in there with him...

Lisa: Yeah, that's right.

Back inside the school, Buffy is still searching out the one remaining vampire left. Unfortunately, the last Vampire is Buffy's boyfreind and is in Chett's office waiting to suck his blood.

Chett is still in his office at his desk when he feels some air blowing on the back of his neck. He turns around and sees the Vampire.

Chett: (screems!) What do you want?

Vampire: You're blood!

Chett: Oh. Well, you can't have it. (Yells for LISA real loud — L-I-S-A, L-I-S-A!!!)

Lisa: Oh no!

Wyatt: Wha, What?

Lisa: I thought I just heard Chett scream my name. He must be in trouble.

Wyatt: Then what you waiting for? Zap in there!

Lisa: I... I can.'t.  I'm too frightened.

Wyatt: Lisa, you have to! Tell you what, I'll go with you. Will that help.

Lisa zaps herself and Wyatt right to where Chett is to find out what that screem was for. Buffy also heard it and is on her way to Chett's office.

Vampire: Oh, good. Second helpings.

Lisa: Oh yeah. Take this buster! (points her hand out, glowing with blue electricity and fires off a good bolt of electricity right at him.)

Vampire: Oh, lookie here. A silicon based computer genie capable of shooting blue lightning bolt magic.

Lisa: Creeeeeepy.

Wyatt: Try again.

Lisa gives him another dose of her lightning magic, but no good. Buffy enters and sees that the Vampire is really her boyfriend.

Vampire: Buffy! Is that you!

Buffy: Yes. It's me. Now, let Chett go.

Vampire: Sure. I've missed you so much.

Lisa: What's going on here? Why not just kill him and get it over with?

Buffy: I can't. He's my boyfriend from before he became a vampire. He won't hurt you.

Wyatt: Well, we have to kill him. He's still a bloodsucking vampire.

Lisa: Be patient Wyatt. If Buffy say's he won't hurt us, maybe he won't.

Buffy walks over toward him and hugs him.

Vampire: Oh, it's so good to see you again, Buffy.

Buffy: Yeah, I've missed you so much. But now.... (jams her wooden stake right into his chest) ... sorry, I had to do it. You know.

Lisa: Icky.

Chett: Okay, Lis, now can you zap the school back to the way it was?

Lisa: I can't. I can't undo my own magic.

Chett: What? How long will it stay a Haunted Mansion then?

Lisa: Hard to say. A week? A weekend?

Part of the school turns back to normal.

Lisa: A day?

Chett: Oh thank god. Its starting to change back.

Buffy: Um... now that the Vampires are dead, can I go home now? I really do need to get back to my own show.

Lisa: Oh sure. (zaps Buffy out of there, sending her back home to her own show.)

Screen fades out for the episode's third commercial break.

 

Fades back in with Chett and Scampi in Chett's office.

Scampi: Well, guess you managed to pull this stunt off after all, Chester.

Chett: Yup! Told you I could.

Scampi: Just one question. How do you know that no school board members came to the party dressed up as something?

Chett: Um.... um... Yikes! You're right, they could have. Oops!

Scampi: Oops, is right! You're lack of careful planning could jeopardize your job here. You have to start being more careful, Chester..

Just then the phone rings...

Chett: Hello?

Caller: Is this Principal Chett Donnelly?

Chett: Yes this is. Who is this?

Caller: Oh, I'm sorry... I'm with the school board.....

Chett and Scampi both look at each other with concerned looks on their faces as the episode ends. Closing credits begin being shown normally with the theme music playing and various shots from this episode in the background.

Special Guest Star
Sarah Michelle Gellar as Buffy

Guest Starring
Bruce Jarchow as Guardien Angel Scampi

With: Sebastian Tillinger as Dick
& Brittany Powell as Paula Sparks

 

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